She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
