How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize