I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
