I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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