this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
