Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize
