I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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