I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Randomize
