How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Randomize
