Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
