Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
