I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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