We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
