I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
