do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Randomize
