a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
