She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize