how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize