You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
