she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
