All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
