Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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