I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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