Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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