What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
