Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
