Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
