Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
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