So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
