i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
