The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
