We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
40s are totally the cure
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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