He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
