You just made me feel so damn special
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
