Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Randomize
