i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
They are going to name an STD after you.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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