we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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