you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize