you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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