Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
