We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
