I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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