i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
false alarm. still invincible.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
