i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize