You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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