Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
