Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She announced her abortion via fbk
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
