i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
