Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
