I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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